Wanda Perry

Life Cycle Consultant

WelcomeEcclesiastesAbout AstrologyBirth Charts / TransitsPlanets in Motion

Your Questions... Answered

Dear Wanda:

I have been in a relationship for several months. My relationship with this man has been a combination of friendship and passion, yet we have not defined ourselves as a couple, mainly because of the mutual need to maintain our separate space and sense of freedom. Because of the nature of our relationship, there are emotional barriers that I have not allowed myself to cross. I believe that he and I both crave a more emotionally intimate connection, yet neither of us really communicate how we feel about one another. I am holding back for a number of reasons and/or fears...two very big factors being: a significant age difference (almost 20 years), and the involvement of my 6-yr-old daughter who has never had a stable relationship with her biological father.

This man keeps me happy and satisfied consistently. He is amazingly kind and compassionate, a true friend and the most excellent lover I have ever had. He has made a huge difference in my life by giving me what I truly need in a companion.

So my question is, do I keep things the way that they are...light and sweet...or open up a line of communication that will most likely lead to a more serious (and potentially complicated) relationship. Please advise.

My birth date and time is XX/XX/XX at XX:XX AM
His birth date is XX/XX/XX, but I do not know his birth time.

~True Cancer

Dear True Cancer:

Thank you for your very candid letter. Allow me to premise my answer by telling you, astrology does not make, create or break a harmonious relationship, people do. The way that astrology can aid you in your quest is to provide some insights of your basic needs or astrological make-up and compare these needs with those of your partner. In this way you may be able to determine the PROBABILITY for suitable companionship. Let me reiterate, the final choice is yours.

Born under the sign of Cancer you are extremely, emotional, sensitive, nurturing and protective of your home and family. Add to that the Moon in Cancer and it intensifies the need for emotional security. The symbol for Cancer is the crab. If you study a crab you will see it naturally runs free until it senses danger. It then stops and pulls in its tentacles, in an act of self-protection.

Pluto in Libra then colors your emotions adding much more depth to your feelings. You yearn for that deep, intimate all encompassing kind of love, and that Ms. Cancer is a really tall order. You sense that should you open up and give your all to this relationship that there will be no turning back. Uncertain of what you might find you choose to play it safe and hold back emotionally. Ask yourself, are you really being true to yourself or can you ever be truly happy and fulfilled living on the perimeter of love?

The man in the question has a Gemini Sun and a Moon in Virgo. He tends to be more intellectual and analytical in his approach with a basic need to be direct, exact and insightful. A Mars/Uranus connection adds a strong passion, excitement and intensity for living. Life with this man would never be boring.

Where you guys fit together nicely is in the area of communication. With both of you having Mercury placements in Cancer, you tend to relate on a more personal level or from the feeling center. You stated in your letter "neither of us really communicates how we feel about one another". I think that is because with this kind of connection, words are not really necessary; as you are so very capable of communicating through feel, touch and emotions.

What it comes down to is how you "feel" when you are together. Forget about the difference in age, because the heart does not see age as a deterrent. Then, you must decide if you can trust him with your feelings. From what you have revealed, you are currently very happy in this relationship and he is very supportive and does fulfill your emotional, mental and physical needs.

A positive Neptune/Venus aspect in your chart this year brings out the potential for true love. This will also help soften or blur the edges on the boundaries that you have set around your heart and heighten your desire for romance and creative self-expression.

How a partner treats you is an important clue as to how they really feel about you. From the way you have described him, it is apparent that he likes you a lot. Trust your feelings and they will reveal to you when the time is right and if it is safe to come out of your shell and take your relationship with this gentleman to the next level. Good luck!